That's Not Fair!

Remember when you were a kid and your brother or sister or neighbor got something that you didn't? Three words came tumbling out of your mouth before you could blink or think--"That's not fair!" Oooh! I can just hear the whiney, pouty tone.

I have two young children and I have declared the word "fair" off limits in my household. Why? Because "fair" is always dependent upon what side of the fence you stand. If you're on the side with no grass while your neighbor has a lush emerald green lawn, you might think it's "not fair" that the grass is greener on the other side. Meanwhile, your neighbor thinks it's "not fair" that you don't have to cut grass in the sweltering summer sun and the neighbor's children envy the natural mud wrestling pit that emerges on your side after every heavy rain.

Years ago at a previous job I was given an assignment that I thought was unfair. A team of writers on another floor in our building needed to draft a letter of condolence to a family that had experienced a tragedy. There were plenty of writers on their team that could (and I thought should) have taken responsibility for the assignment. But, instead, the assignment skipped their team entirely and somehow landed on my desk. I was already swamped, yet I was asked to take on someone else's responsibility--and on a tight deadline! "This is so unfair!" I thought.

But, thank God that the Holy Spirit leads us and guides us into all truth. While trying to gather the right words for the letter I was steadily stewing and asking "Why?! Why?! Why?!" Then, the thought came to me, "Have you forgotten who you really work for? You are My servant. You are My chosen vessel. This is no ordinary circumstance and this is no ordinary letter. This letter may be signed by an executive, but it will come from Me. I placed you in this position for such a time as this."

I was so humbled! I was so ashamed! There I was worried about my workload and what was "fair" while a family was hurting and simply needed a few words of empathy and encouragement to help them get through. I didn't know it at the time, but the family was Christian, which was perfect because, although I was working for a secular organization, the words that came out of me most definitely had a Christ-like feel.

I also didn't realize that God was preparing my heart and my gifts for ministry, which has proven to be my true vocation. When I really came to terms with the fact that God is the giver of every good and perfect gift, is in full control, and is all-knowing, I realized my perspective on "fair" was, well, unfair.

Have you ever had a sibling take the blame and punishment for something you did? I have a sneaking suspicion that you did not blurt out, "That's not fair!" Were you ever forgiven for a debt that you owed? I am confident that your response was not, "That's not fair!" When I think about how Jesus went to the cross, not for any crimes that He had done, but for my sins, somehow--ironically--the words, "That's not fair!" are nowhere on my lips.

I am glad that God is a just God, yet a merciful God who does not judge us in relation to others--which is inherent in our notion of "fairness"--and doesn't ever give us more than we can bear. No matter how overwhelming things may seem, God doesn't ask anything of us that we haven't already been equipped to do. Of course not. Just think about it. THAT simply would not be "fair."

Rev. Karen